I thought about some Sunday golf on Saturday night when several fine folk associated with Kjel.org (and 30% of Beaverton) got some dinner out on the lawn at this place. Policing 9 kids in the woods behind the Raccoon (nobody got hit by a car or abducted. Victory!) when I should have been enjoying beers with friends made me think of outings that by law cannot involve anyone younger than 21. A round of golf at a certain course was sounding very appealing. However, by Sunday morning I had decided against it: the CEO has to at least occasionally make an effort to step it up as a husband and father, and I’d decided that Sunday would be one of those times and I was going to blow off golf. The Edumacator however had other ideas . . .

The Chief stepped up to the plate and hit an absolutely mammoth home run. I was at the grocery store Sunday morning with the AK when the call came in from the CFO. The Educator has a 12:15 tee-time for you guys at Edgefield. You better hurry. Don’t worry I don’t need you today. [The Chief Sniper’s lovely wife] is coming over with the boys, and we are going to play at the HQ. Go have fun. If the CFO ever wonders why I like and love her so much she ought to treat Sunday as Exhibit A. I owe you one, mama.

Me and the little dude tore ass around the store, got our provisions and then headed home, again at a high rate of speed. We perhaps even exceeded the posted speed limit a time or two during our journey. I will neither confirm nor deny if this is true.

Shortly after delivering the groceries to the HQ I picked up the Chief and we headed out to Edgefield. There we met the Man from the Dalles, and our day officially began. We signed on for the 20 hole course; no half-assing it for us. No sirree. As we were paying for our round in the clubhouse the Chief HVAC technician spoke thusly, setting the tone for the rest of the afternoon: “You know what? Lets get some gin before we order our beers for hole #1!” You sir are a genius! And so our 20 hole journey began, with an excellent first step.

It was an absolutely perfect day for Edgefield golf. The course was empty, with no one at any time in front of or behind us. While I suck at golf, the least weak (I hesitate to use the word ‘best’ about any aspect of my game) clubs I swing are the putter and the wedge. Guess which two clubs you need at the pub course? I only lost about 5 balls all day which for me means it was a quality outing. The double bonus? No asswipe threw any of our clubs into the woods after we’d laid them down for a second. I hear that happens there sometimes.

The back 20 has a beer girl now who just circles the west course asking golfers if they need anything. We ran into her just as the first beers were gone and restocked: ice cold 22’s of Ruby, which was just the perfect beer for the day. It is a good thing she only took cash; otherwise I would have started ordering shots for 2/3rds of our threesome — those were on the menu as well. As it was we scraped together enough money for beer, and it was the best beer I’ve had in a long, long time. Thank you, gentlemen.

Unfortunately it was so bright that the pictures didn’t turn out well, or come even close to conveying how glorious it was out there. Below is the Educator, attempting a long putt for birdie. We played every hole as a par three, even those that topped out at 42 yards. I came into the clubhouse at about 30 over — not a bad day for me.

The Educator wisely taking advice from the 1/3 of the group that actually knew how to golf:

The view was outstanding from the top of the course. My dorky cell phone did it justice to a rate of about 10%. It did manage however to do justice to the Educator’s belly to the tune of about 150%. For anyone who hasn’t seen him in a while, trust me, it is the camera — he didn’t just put on 50 lbs while you weren’t looking.

After our round we had Linner on the patio, and then retired to the Little Red Shed for some post Linner refreshment. We all agreed that it is probably for the better that the Edgefield golf course is way the hell out in Troutdale, because if it was located on, say, the property presently occupied by Wilson High School I would spend $1,000 a year playing there. My short game would be absolutely phenomenal by now, so there is that, but probably not worth the extra grand a year.

An awesome Sunday, and just what I needed. See you guys again on Saturday.