The CEO will not be giving a narrative account of a certain recent road trip to the beach and will neither confirm nor deny certain things that may there have occurred. Side note: still no word yet from the rental company re getting that damage deposit back.
I will instead present you with quotes from assorted Will Ferrell characters. Read into these quotes what you may.
Frank: Anything? Well, uh I guess I, deep down, am feeling a little confused. I mean, suddenly, you get married, and you’re supposed to be this entirely different guy. I don’t feel different. I mean, take yesterday for example. We were out at the Olive Garden for dinner, which was lovely. And uh, I happen to look over at a certain point during the meal and see a waitress taking an order, and I found myself wondering what color her underpants might be. Her panties. Uh, odds are they are probably basic white, cotton, underpants. But I sort of think well maybe they’re silk panties, maybe it’s a thong. Maybe it’s something really cool that I don’t even know about. You know, and uh, and I started feeling… what? what I thought we were in the trust tree in the nest, were we not?
Buddy: I thought maybe we could make ginger bread houses, and eat cookie dough, and go ice skating, and maybe even hold hands.
Frank: I told my wife I wouldn’t drink tonight. Besides, I got a big day tomorrow. You guys have a great time.
Ron Burgundy: I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly…
Frank: [after funneling a beer] Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it’s so good!
Frank: [laughing] You’re… you’re crazy man. I like you, but you’re crazy.
Frank: I see Blue! He looks glorious!
Ron Burgundy: Knights of Columbus, that hurt!
Frank: Damn it. I’m such an idiot.
Mustafa: Hello up there. Is the movie over? I’m still down here… and I’m still in quite a lot of pain. Maybe someone in the lobby could call an ambulance. Oh, the pain is really quite severe. I… I’ve fashioned a makeshift splint. Here goes nothing. Aaaa…
Buddy: You smell like beef and cheese, you don’t smell like Santa!
Mugatu: They’re break-dance fighting!
Ron Burgundy: Boy, that escalated quickly… I mean, that really got out of hand fast.
Frank: What happened? I blacked out.
Frank: You tell anyone about this and I’ll fucking kill you. I’m kidding, I’m kidding, we’ll have him home by midnight.
Frank: Don’t worry. The pledges will clean it up.
Buddy: So… do you wanna eat food?
Ricky Bobby: Dear Lord Baby Jesus, I want to thank you for this wonderful meal,
Buddy: [to the racoon] Does somebody need a hug?
Ricky Bobby: Well let me just quote the late-great Colonel Sanders, who said…”I’m too drunk to taste this chicken.”
Ron Burgundy: [after jumping into the grizzly bear pit at the San Diego Zoo] I immediately regret this decision.
Ricky Bobby: [after a girl flashes him] Please be 18
Frank: Yeah, what kind of gun is this?
Chazz: I permanently call shotgun.
Frank: I just wanna tell you guys thanks for being here. Best day ever.
Ron Burgundy: We are laughing and we are very good friends. Good buddies sharing a special moment…
Frank: I had an awesome time
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