A special thanks goes out to the Chief Educator and * [his ladyfriend, as my grandma might have said] for allowing me to accompany them to Hillsboro yesterday to look at potential cabinets and countertops for their pad. And letting me watch most of Conan the Barbarian on their couch. Did you know that Conan the Barbarian was the first movie that * [the lady in question] can remember seeing? She even wrote a report about it in the first grade. I bet it was a fine report. Someting worthy of a newly minted International Director even. Well done, ma’am; your cover story just got that much better. And the CEO is very, very sorry for the zipper incident. The “mule” stayed in the barn so to speak, thank God, and now let’s never speak of it again.

* The Lady actually works for a certain shadowy organization attached to the U.S. government. Hint: it’s name is a three letter acronym. The CEO refuses to divulge her actual title because I might want to work them some day. Freedom isn’t free.