It’s been a tough couple of years for Mariner fans. There are just too many painful issues surrounding the M’s to get into all of them — instead, I will focus just on one with a Kjel.org connection:

Several years ago the CFO and I were at a Mariner game. She was still relatively new to Mariner spectating and baseball fandom in general, and wasn’t completely familiar with players stats or how they were arrived at. A certain Mariner third baseman stepped to the plate, and they flashed his season batting average on the big screen. This was several weeks into the season, mind you, far enough along that the scoreboard operator didn’t feel obligated to show last season’s stats. The CFO was confused. I thought batting averages started with either a one, two, or three? she said. Why does his start with a zero? How is that possible?

How is that possible, indeed. It was possible because that player was Jeff Cirillo, a black hole in the Mariner lineup for two seasons before he was finally released. Jeff Cirillo now? Batting .393 for the Milwaukee Brewers. Meanwhile, Cirillo’s replacement, 2004 NL MVP runner-up Adrian Beltre (.334 ; 48 HR in 2004) is hitting .221 in 2006 and is on pace to hit 8 homers this year. I know baseball isn’t fair, but this just makes no sense. The only logical explanation I can come up with is that third base at Safeco has some sort of hex on it. Third base at Safeco gives the stink-eye to all who inhabit it. The Mariners need to draft a voodoo priest of some sort, or at least get a bench coach who knows something about amulets and charms and the like.